Early Riser/ Why I Hate Parks.

Just a little break from Maddy’s birth story.  And because I actually got some hard earned sleep last night.

Maddy had a rough afternoon yesterday.  It seems like her tummy was bothering her, but she’d still flash me smiles every now and then, so I knew she was all good.   We took her and Kenzie to the park last night.  You can’t just go for a walk with Kenzie without ending up at the park.  I’ve tried.  You start walking in the opposite direction, and she will stop, point in the direction of one of the two parks near our house, and say, “NO, PARK!”

Well, I hate the park.  Back in May, she fell from a pretty high opening on the playground.  It was a good 4 foot fall, and she fell on her head/ neck.  WORST MOMENT OF MY LIFE.  Mike and I were both there.  We usually follow her up on the jungle gym, but this particular day, she decided she was going to just go down the slide 20 times.  Mike sat down with me since I had Maddy while we watched her play.  Of course, after she walked up the steps, she looked over at us, decided to do a little dance/ jump, lost her balance, and flew right off of the platform.  Let me ask this.  WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE GIANT OPENINGS THAT LEAD TO NOWHERE ON PLAYGROUND PLATFORMS?  This platform was 4 feet high, and it looked like they  could have been connected to monkey bars at some point.   It’s like they are asking for a disaster.

We were very lucky, because she did not lose consciousness.  She also had no blood, just a few scrapes from the wood chips that she landed on.  We ran home so we could clean her up and check her head.  I gave her a cookie to occupy her while I tried to wash off her wounds.  She took a bite of the cookie, cried, and then spit it out.  Now I was concerned that she chipped a tooth or something.  GREAT.  Got her all cleaned up while Maddy was screaming in the background.  She was still pretty out of sorts.  Mike hung out with her while I called the nurse triage line at the hospital to see if we needed to take her into the ER.  THIS SHIT ALWAYS HAPPENS ON THE WEEKENDS.  Seriously, you’ll find that your kids most often get sick or hurt on the weekends, when your doctor is not available.  So you’re always second guessing yourself…do I go to the ER?  Do I go to urgent care?

They told me that since her fall was less than 5 feet (I almost had to go back to the park to measure because I wasn’t quite sure, and you don’t want to be wrong about something like that), she wouldn’t need to go to the ER.  Just need to monitor her for any weird signs, make sure she doesn’t pass out, etc.  Luckily, we had a doctor’s appointment scheduled for that next week for a follow up, so they would check out her pretty little head then.  After her good nap, and me checking up on her pretty frequently, she woke up and ate her Mac & Cheese and a cookie with no problem.  Then, she started running around the table and jumping on the couch.  I was thrilled that she was acting like her normal, insane self, but it also concerned me that with our luck, she would go flying off the couch and another injury would ensue.  No thanks.  So I think I bribed her with another cookie or playing on the iPad.  Don’t judge me until you have two kids.  I always said, “my kids will never play on electronics like iPads or watch TV”….hahahaha, I was so dumb.  But we’ll save that for another post.

This post turned into why I hate the park, when it was supposed to be about how I actually got a decent night’s sleep.  Anyhow, we took both girls to the park that evening and Kenzie had a great time.  We had to bribe her to leave.  Ice cream, this time.  But Maddy was losing her shit as we started the walk home.  It’s a few blocks from our house.  So I ran with the stroller (something you’ll never see me doing, because who has time for exercise…), but it didn’t seem to help.  So I took her out and walked with her, which was much better for her (try steering a dumb stroller through a winding path with a 4 month old kicking you).

Kenzie went to bed around 9 that night – no fussing, no fighting.  Maddy went down around 10 p.m., which wasn’t so bad.  I expected to be woken up around 2 or 3, as per usual.  Well guess who waltzed into our room at 3?  Kenzie P!   Hahaha, I was so thrilled when I heard her little footsteps making their way to our room.  I kicked Mike.  Then I shoved him.  “Hey, your daughter is awake”…..he made it very clear that once Maddy was born, he would be on Kenzie duty at night.  I agreed.   Kenzie has been sleeping through the night since before we had Maddy, of course.  So this deal basically meant that Mike never had to wake up.  Cool.  Until now.  At 3 a.m.   SUCKER.

I went right back to sleep.  And guess what?  Maddy didn’t wake up once that night.  You must be wondering if Kenzie went back to bed after she woke up Mike at 3.  NOPE!  Girlfriend stayed awake until I woke up with Maddy at 7.  Mike had a look of pure exhaustion on his face.  I just smiled.  Kenzie proceeded to fall asleep on the ride to her babysitter’s house, though.  It was a nice, quiet ride in.

Long story short, Maddy is a MUCH better sleeper than Kenzie ever was at her age.  I know the size is a big factor, but I deserve this after over a year of crazy nights with Kenzie.  Loved those nights with my girl, but mama needs her rest so she doesn’t go postal at work.

33 Weeks and 4 Days

After I showered this morning, I looked down and thought the following things:

(1)  Shit, I should really shave my legs soon.  This will be embarrassing if I go into labor.

(2)  Shit, I really need to schedule a bikini wax.  This will be embarrassing if I go into labor.

A few things happened during my first labor and delivery.  I was lucky, you could say.  The day my water broke, I was at a bridal shower for my sister-in-law.  It was April, so I was wearing a cute wrap dress and heels.  I was required to look nice, so I had just shaved my legs that morning, straightened my hair, and even did my nails.

I had also started on my every-few-week bikini waxes.  Really, just another excuse to go to the spa and get something else done.  So I got my bikini wax the Thursday before I went into labor.  Again, perfect timing.  Even though I didn’t know in advance that I would end up having to get an episiotomy, I was lucky with that, too (in my opinion).  I feel like the less going on down there, the better off you are when someone is trying to stitch up your lady parts.

My fear is that this time, everything will be the opposite.  Meaning I might actually feel the contractions before my water breaks (if it breaks at all prematurely), that I will have put off shaving my legs too long, or that I will have missed my bikini wax appointment.  I know – some of these things are stupid, but I think I took them for granted last time because everything just worked out so well!

The good news is that the chances of my water breaking early are higher because it has already happened to me.  As long as I have time to get that epidural in, I will be okay.  That is the part that scares me the most, honestly.  How can it ever get easier to let someone insert a needle into your spine without moving a muscle?

I also asked my doctor if I would end up needing another episiotomy this time around.  The recovery sucked big time (again, in my experience, the recovery was worse than the actual labor and delivery process for sure).  She said it would be very unlikely that I would need to get cut again, because my body “knows what to do” this time around, and as such, labor shouldn’t last as long (so she says).

I was in the hospital last week for dehydration and contractions (I will save the details for a different post), but they ended up doing a bedside ultrasound to check on baby.  This was nice because I didn’t get to have one that late in the game for my first because she was so early.  Anyhow, the ultrasound tech showed me the kid already has two centimeters of hair on his or her head.  THANKS FOR THE HEARTBURN!  Oh well, at least we won’t have a bald baby 🙂

WE COULD HAVE BABY #2 IN TWO WEEKS!  YIKES!

 

 

Potty Training & Other Fun Topics (+31 weeks pregnant)

I type this as my eyes are closing.  It’s only 1:47 p.m. on a Monday, but I am getting more exhausted by the day.  I need to hire a personal chef, driver, stylist, and maid.  I’m sure I’m leaving something out.  Oh, pregnancy.  Just put me out of my misery.

I just wanted to document that Kenzie used her potty for the first time on her own!  Could not be more proud of my girl.

We only just bought the fake potty (see here:  Fisher Price Potty Light Up) last weekend.  I thought it was going to be a few months before she even considered taking it for a spin.  Of course I had high hopes last weekend and thought I would have her going in the potty immediately (ha, I’m so dumb).  She was merely interested in the fake flushing mechanism of her new toy and that it lit up and talked upon flushing the handle.

So last night, little chica was sitting on my lap as I was reading a Sesame Street book to her.  All of the sudden, my leg got really warm, so I know she had peed in her diaper.  I stopped reading and said, “Kenz, you are supposed to tell me when you have to potty, remember?”  and she replied with, “potty!”…so I figured why not try.  It was nearly time for her bubble bath, so I raced her up the stairs to the bathroom thinking maybe she had some left in her.  I said, “You sit on the potty while I fill up your bath tub, okay?”  and she replied, “okay!”…so I helped her take off her pants and diaper, and she promptly sat down on her little toy.  She sat longer than she normally did before, and all of the sudden, I heard a little bit trickle out!  And of course, there is a sensor at the bottom of her potty that sings “You went potty!!” when something fills it, even just a little.  I screamed for Mike and then told her how happy and proud I was of her.  Then I went and got her a sticker to put on her potty (I thought I would start with the sticker system, even if she just tries, she will get a sticker to put on the back of her potty).

I know she is not magically trained now and there is much work to be done still, but this is a huge milestone!  Now the babysitter can also be on board with potty training during the day (she also does the sticker system).  I understand she might regress after the new baby comes along, but that is to be expected.

The two main things that I wanted to have in motion prior to delivering baby number 2 were:

(1)  have Kenzie sleeping in her big girl bed consistently (her big girl bed is a freaking queen size Simmons complete with pillow top – I bought it when I moved out on my own, and it only got like two years of use – girl has got it made in the shade).  Fingers crossed all over the place that this new kiddo is a fan of the rock n’ play sleeper.  Kenzie HATED it and would only sleep on my chest.  Otherwise, it will be co-sleeping again for the first few months.  But that’s okay, because I feel slightly more prepared as to what my options will be if baby is not a good sleeper.

(2)  start potty training.  Successful start, and we will just keep on keepin’ on.

*I also wanted a deep freezer for breastmilk storage purposes.  Mike was always annoyed at how many frozen plastic containers I had spread all over our tiny freezer.  I told him to avoid that this time around, he needed to buy me a deep freezer.  Find a place for it – I don’t care where.  We will need it in the future with two kids, anyhow.  His main protest is that I will fill it with other crap and forget about it and then it will all be freezer burn/ spoiled/ etc.  So I have to keep bothering him about that to ensure that I get my way.

*I also tried to get him to buy a few sleepers at Target this weekend for the hospital.  Aden + Anais had these adorable sleepers on clearance:  Aden + Anais Sleeper   He was like, “what do we need those for?”  UH, for new baby at the hospital!!  The little wrap shirt that they put Kenzie in when she was born was a complete pain in the ass.  I want something that zips up easily – no buttons, straps, nothing over the head.  I want EASY this time.  So I have to keep fighting the good fight for that too, especially because I will probably tell Mike to leave us at the hospital so he can be with Kenzie overnight, and so he can get some rest as well.

*And finally, I am getting some pressure from people about having a second baby shower!  I guess people have “sprinkles” or whatever, but I’m pretty sure that is normally when you know you are having a baby of the opposite gender (which I don’t want to know), and normally is a much smaller gathering at someone’s house.  I don’t like to put people out.  If they want to buy us something, they will.  I’ll tell you this, I will want some good beer, sushi, and sandwiches following birth.  That’s all I want.  Oh, and maybe some special brownies for when my pain meds run out.  ::Is she kidding?::

The First Ear Infection

Last Thursday was easily the worst night/ morning we have EVER had with Kenzie.  Even counting her colicky stage.

At one point, I said to Mike (over screaming cries):  “We should just give this other child to your sister or something, I don’t think I’m equipped to handle two – I’m not cut out for this”  I was obviously joking, but it was so bad!  She wouldn’t even take any medicine because she was hysterical the entire time.  Just a little Tylenol would have helped the situation immensely, given she probably had terrible pain in her ear.

She eventually tired herself out around 9 and wanted to eat something (just jello), but then she was walking around like normal and laughing for about 45 minutes.  WHAT THE HELL.  I think she is good to go (if I were smart, I would have given her some tylenol in those 45 minutes of calm), and we head up to bed.  I lay her down.  THE WORLD IMPLODES.

Long story short, she finally went to bed at 4:30 a.m. because she just couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore.  She slept on my chest for a few hours before waking up for the day.

It is the ABSOLUTE WORST when your kid can’t tell you what is wrong.  I know everyone says that after your child starts talking in full sentences, you wish it would go back because they won’t shut up, but I am just so excited to soon be able to hold little conversation with her.  Her personality is so fun – she’s going to comical to talk with, if nothing else.

So, as soon as I am able to the next morning, I call her doctor’s office to get her in.  This was on a Friday.  The one downside to her pediatrician’s office is that they are closed on the weekends.  You have your ped’s cell phone number if you need to contact him or her, but of course, you feel like it has to be an absolute emergency to call them and you feel terrible doing it (I’ve done this twice, and he always sounds like he’s at a party – never rude or annoyed though).  It still sucks.

I get her an appointment at 10 a.m.   Another day I had to take off.  My boss is great about it, since he has four kids of his own.  But all I can focus on are my extra paid maternity leave days slipping away.  That’s okay, though, because I was there when my daughter needed me most.

The doctor checks her right ear first.  My biggest worry is that she’s going to say, “well, it’s probably just teething – just something you have to work through”….and then my head would have exploded.  Instead, she looks in the first ear and says, “Ooh, that one is definitely infected” – and checks the other one and says, “and this one is trying to get infected too”….A little bit of relief washes over me.  WHAT KIND OF PARENT IS HAPPY WHEN A DOCTOR TELLS THEM THEIR KID HAS AN EAR INFECTION?!  I was just so happy that there was a reason behind her hours and hours of crying.

So on the Amoxicillin she went!  18 months was a good run without needing any antibiotics.  For the record, she starting acting like her crazy self again almost immediately.  I hope the next time her ear hurts, she is just able to tell us 🙂

And to end this completely off-topic, the show “This is Us” is nowhere close to being as good as “Parenthood” was.  I just finished watching what I think was the 4th or 5th episode.  I find myself fast forwarding through much of the story lines (both brothers when they are in present times).  I have only been watching the overweight sister’s segments, and that ends up being like 15 minutes of the show and even that annoys me.  Get it together, NBC.  Nothing will ever replace Parenthood, so just bring it back, please.

PS:  I remembered to wear deodorant today and even got to shower!  Success all around.  And ultrasound is tomorrow to find out gender.  A big week for us all.  Stay tuned!

 

Today, I am thankful for my job.

*Note – this was written a few weeks ago*

I bitch about my job a lot.  A LOT.  I generally have to deal with a lot of dumb people (both from the public side and people who work here), and a lot of drama.

But during and after pregnancy, I probably couldn’t ask for a better or more flexible job.

And let’s talk health insurance for a brief moment.  I had heard horror stories about how expensive it could be to have a baby in a hospital, even with the proper health insurance.  As in even after insurance coverage, you own hundreds, sometimes thousands.  I was preparing myself for the worst.  I had learned tricks about how you can call and ask for a discount if you pay for everything in one big payment.  Ugh.  I even prepared Mike for it.

After our fancy hospital stay (I really enjoyed it actually, aside from the lack of sleep), we got our first bill.  I assumed it was just for Kenzie or just a small part of it all.  Total amount due was $14.  Or maybe less.  I can’t really remember.  But it was for both mine and my daughter’s stay at the hospital.  Labor, delivery, hanging out for two days after in the mother baby wing…  I kept waiting for another bill to come, but it did not.  Insurance covered nearly everything.  So basically, I can never get another job until I am done having kids.  Or getting sick.   Government insurance is the best insurance.  Pay isn’t the best, but the benefits will always be worth it.  We even get a $1,000 Benny card.  You can use this card to pay for prescriptions, co-pays, or even (in my case) breast pumps!  YEAH!

Insurance details aside, I have had two rough pregnancies (so far).  Lots of nausea, lots of puking, lots of tears.  When you are feeling that sick, it’s really hard to stay motivated, no matter what your job is.  I am blessed to have an office with a door, a parking space that is incredibly close to the entrance, and a boss who is flexible with my schedule and understanding.  Things could be a lot worse for me.  There were times during my pregnancy with Kenzie when I got so sick at work that all I could do was sit in the conference room with my head on the table in the dark.  Or all I could do was sit on the ground of my office pretending to file things or read through papers.   But I got through it, and no one questioned me.  So I have to remember that.

And now, I have the luxury of leaving the office at lunch whenever I want, and spending an hour with my daughter at the babysitter’s or taking her to the park, and picking her up right at 5 p.m.   Never have to worry about overtime, or getting calls while I’m at home.

And finally, a prime example this week of why I appreciate this flexible, shitty job.

Kenzie had a fever starting on Monday.  I stayed home with her on Tuesday and brought her to the doctor.  The doctor said she believed it was the start of Hand, Foot, Mouth disease.  The only indicator was that when she looked in her mouth, she thought she saw a few blister-like things.  Plus the fever, and her lack of appetite (because maybe her throat hurt).  I ask what we can do or what medicine we can give her.  “You just have to wait it out, you can give her Tylenol for the fever.  Usually takes 3 to 5 days to run its course”….FANTASTIC.

Anyhow, I’m still not certain it was in fact hand, foot, mouth (which by the way never existed when we were kids to my knowledge, so where are these viruses coming from?!).  She doesn’t have anything on her hands, feet, or booty (no rash or anything).  Maybe we just got lucky with a very mild case or it is just a random virus.  Either way, I was able to take off Tuesday and Wednesday (very last minute) to take care of baby girl, since you cannot send her to the babysitter with an infection that could be spread to others.  My mom came over Thursday so I could go back to work, and Mike is taking off Friday.  I always get stuck taking more time off, but we will chalk it up to the fact that his job is a little more demanding than mine.  Whatever.  I’d rather be home anyhow.  BUT, I really should be saving my time now for the next baby.  Needless to say, I will be working from home more than I had to with Kenzie.

So yes, my job blows sometimes, but today, I will take it and remember that it will be worth it in the long run.  If only they had paid maternity leave.

Feeling Defeated.

Today, I just want to write about how defeated I am feeling.  I don’t feel this way all the time, but this morning was the absolute worst.  I know I said I would post about breastfeeding and baby shower gifts, but I’m not feeling it today.

I think that feeling defeated is sometimes part of being a parent.  You have your ups and downs, and just like life, it’s sometimes easier to remember the rough times than the happy ones.

This morning, I knew my husband was going to need to leave early for work (before Kenzie and I woke up, for sure).  This meant I would have no help in the morning, which is fine.  Mike helps a great deal when he is home in the morning during the time I try to get myself and baby girl ready for the day.  It allows me the time for a quick shower and to get dressed while he finished his breakfast with baby girl.

She went to sleep around 11:30 last night.  Yep, you read that right.  I’m so tired of reading about or hearing that kids exist who sleep for 12 hours at a time, no problem.  Screw those kids.  THEY SUCK.

Luckily, she slept all the way through to 6:45…the time that Mike left and the time that I was about the jump in the shower.  WRONG.  So I nursed her since she was crying like a crazy (if she seems happy in the morning, I don’t nurse her, we just go straight down to greet the dog and eat some waffles).  So we went downstairs, she started whining, but then we walked outside to let the dog out (she loves the dog and outside, so win-win), and then went back inside to warm up her waffle.

She was pretty happy until I told her I needed to shower super fast, and that she was going to hang in her pack & play for a few minutes.  You would have thought I was depriving her of food the way that she flailed her little body about, tears streaming down her face, standing up in the pack & play.  So like an idiot, I picked her up and brought her upstairs.  I thought she would be happier in her crib with some toys.  WRONG.  She sits down immediately, and then throws her head back into the wooden side of the crib, and continues to cry even more.  OMG.  At this point, I just sweetly told her, “Baby girl, mama has to shower really quickly – I won’t even shave my legs…I’ll be out in two minutes” and she continued to cry the entire time.  I felt like the worst possible mom.

She better be cutting like 4 teeth with her crabby patty attitude and massive drooling these past few days.  I blame so much on teething.  Motrin can only do so much.

Bottom line, I ran out of the shower as soon as I was decently clean to grab baby girl and calm her down, and am a hot mess today.  I think she just wanted me, and I think she missed my husband being home in the morning when she wakes up.  Makes me more thankful for the help that he gives when he can.  I looked in the mirror today at work and actually thought, “Eh, could be worse”….WTF?

A good end to the story though – I visited Kenzie on my lunch, and she was happy as can be.  Running around with her toys, wanting me to read her books, etc.  So maybe she just needed a nap.   Tomorrow will be better.

 

Little Chicky is ONE!

Just a quick post to say a little Happy First Birthday to my favorite girl.  She has added so much love and fun to our lives, and I can’t wait to see how her personality grows as time passes.  Love her so, so much!  I’ll post later on the fabric banner I am making her for her party this weekend (the first real DIY project I have ever done…)