10 weeks – we have a heart beat!

Well, I had the dreaded/ not-so-dreaded first doctor’s appointment today!

I opted to go by myself, since there was a good chance we wouldn’t be able to hear the heart beat at this point anyhow.

So I walk into the office and am immediately super annoyed.  The whole waiting room (small to begin with) was chocked full of people, only two chairs unclaimed, and in between people of course.  I’m sure I’m weird for this, but I usually like sitting on the ends so that I can get up quickly if needed.  Whatever.  I tried to chalk it up to the fact that this was a good sign and that the doctor was in high demand.

I fill out the remainder of my paperwork, and then notice they gave me a flu shot sign-off form.  Um, am I the only one who was told that pregnant women should not be getting flu shots?   DUH.  So I walk up to the receptionist and say, “I’m pregnant, so I’m not going to fill this out, right?”  And she tells me that no, I still need to fill it out completely and then write “DECLINE” at the bottom, but that all doctors are recommending flu shots, even for pregnant ladies.  Whatevs.  I declined that.  There was enough for me to worry about today already.

So, I finally get called in, and met with the nurse first.  She was incredibly nice, so that was a start in the right direction.  Then she gave me a gift bag with some journaling tools, freebies for the baby, etc.  Unexpected!  Then, I had to pee in a cup, as expected.  No problemo.    Then, I made the mistake of asking what was going to go down at this first appointment, since I had heard conflicting reports from other mums.

“You will get a pap smear, and then you will get orders to schedule an ultrasound and for routine blood work”

Ugh, those two phrases:  pap smear and blood work.  CRINGE.

Oh well.  It’s always nice to greet a brand new doctor with the exchange over a pap smear.  Good times.

Here is the best part:  the nurse tells me to strip, and that the doctor will be in shortly.  Shortly = about 30 minutes.  30 minutes are more than enough minutes for me to get my heart racing just THINKING about this pap smear.  I know it sounds stupid, and the whole process is over in like a minute, but I just don’t like random people poking around down there and swabbing me with some random little toothbrush thing.

So in comes the doctor.  I love her immediately.  Very laid back and kind of funny.  “Okay babe, let’s get this hard part out of the way before we talk baby.  We both know you won’t remember anything I said before we get the pap smear out of the way!”   Oh so true.  I don’t even remember what else we talked about before then.  But then it was done.  And I was okay.

Luckily, directly after that, she followed up with a fun activity.  We got to listen for the bebay’s heart!  I already knew this, but she warned me that there was a 50% chance that we wouldn’t be able to hear the heart since it was so early on.   Lucky for both of us, bebay was feeling bouncy today, so after about 30 LONG seconds, she said, “there it is!” and then moved around a bit more to get a better sound.  Oh, I was so happy!  Not like sobbing like you often see in the movies (though maybe I will save that for the ultrasound), but I was extremely happy!  She told me that there is now a less than 3% chance that this could end in miscarriage.  3% is still 3%, but I’m feeling much better about all of this already.  Promptly after that, she got called out to another emergency, and the nurse came in and told me it would be another 30 minutes.  That’s okay, I was still on cloud nine and just opted to stay in the room to go through the little newbie-mom gift bag 🙂

She came back about 30 minutes later, apologized profusely, and went right into where she left off:  foods that I can and cannot eat.  I was half hoping that she would say, “Oh, it’s fine – just eat sandwiches in moderation!”  But she did not.  She said that I could eat Subway if they heated it, first.  So I think Subway is all I can eat now.  (kidding) – She also told me that Oscar Meyer makes nitrate free hot dogs.  I searched the hot dog section for a good 15 minutes at Jewel after my appointment, and no such luck.  Maybe they are a special order?  I WILL FIND THEM – CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Another glorious thing:  she prescribed me some Zofran – evidently some magical pill that doesn’t make you puke while/ during/ after eating!  I’ve been in good shape today so far, but I still feel like I could sleep for days and be okay.

That’s enough for today!  I’m ready for a nap.

Happy Days!

9 weeks, 3 days

I figure I should start titling these posts with how far along I am, so I can look back on this and remember how terrible each week was 😉

So, my first doctor’s appointment is tomorrow.  I will be 9 weeks and 4 days along.  I have been reading reports stating that yes, you will be able to hear your baby’s heartbeat at this point, or no, you will not be able to hear your baby’s heartbeat.  So much back and forth.  I just want a nice, clean-cut confirmation that things are on the up-and-up.  The people who I could ask don’t yet know that I am pregnant, so there is no point.  Just wait and see at this time.

Today, by the way, SUCKED.

I woke up, knowing that I needed to eat something.  Walked downstairs and started up the toaster with a bagel.  Directly after I pressed down on the bagel lever, I had to RUN for the bathroom.  Oh yes, the lovely bile again.  SO GROSS.  I am certain that my throwing up sounds so gross that it probably makes others want to throw up, in return.  My husband always comes to check on me, asking if I am okay.  He is so sweet.  I probably look like the saddest person, with tears rolling down my face.  Does anyone else cry while throwing up?  It seems to be an involuntary thing for me.  Anyhow, I crawled back into bed, while he fixed me the rest of my bagel and got me some orange juice.  I started eating, and felt good finishing the bagel and orange juice.

Let me fill you in on something.  Drinking an acidic drink, such as orange juice, right after puking your guts out was probably not a good idea for me.  But, it sounded good at the time.  I needed something with a bit of flavor.  Well, that was STUPID.  I ate, I drank, and then I got up and promptly puked everything back up.  Stupid, stupid me.  I think I dislocated my jaw in the process.  Ugh.

So, the rest of the day has pretty much been a wash.  Luckily, we had no real plans.  I just laid on the couch all day, trying to slowly eat foods that weren’t going to disgust me.

Oh, and cooking anything in our house ends up being a real treat.  For example, my husband fried up some potstickers for his dinner, since I was not available to go shopping/ make him anything.  The smell was just excruciating.  I had to open up all the windows.  I can still smell it!  We tried making something in the crock pot over night a few weeks ago…BIG MISTAKE.  The smell permeated the whole house.  I nearly went out and slept in the car.

Okay, that’s enough of the gross update for the day.  Thanks for hanging out.  I am posting this in hopes of other women in my position googling symptoms and things such as this to make sure they are not alone.  It’s something that I do, and it helps me to sleep at night sometimes.

Anyhow, big prayers for tomorrow’s appointment, please.  I really, really hope that they can sense some sort of heartbeat!  I don’t like hanging out in limbo, and I’m sure bebay doesn’t, either.

What did I eat last night?! ::gross post – TMI ahead!::

Shit just got real.

I woke up this morning, feeling like crap.  Got in the shower.  About 10 minutes later, I had to promptly exit the shower, hair still sudsy.

A few seconds later, I am throwing up this nasty, extremely bitter, yellow liquid.  I have never tasted something so disgusting.  In my mind, I’m thinking, “What the hell did I eat last night?  How could it have turned into this nasty yellow liquid!?”   I had a burrito from Chipotle last night, and I definitely ate until I was full.  No way Chipotle could have produced this nasty liquid.

Upon further review and research, I learned that this nastiness I threw up is actually bile.  This is what happens when there is nothing left in your stomach.  Also, I was likely dehydrated.  It’s been really hard for me to drink water and keep it down, oddly enough.  I know I have to stay hydrated, but it’s so hard if water makes you gag!

Anyhow, it does make me feel slightly better that I am still getting some sort of morning sickness.  I read a terrible article on miscarriages and finding out for the first time at your first doctor’s appointment when they cannot find a heart beat.  How incredibly sad.  I couldn’t even imagine.  And then what?  They tell you that you will soon miscarry?  I just want to get through the first appointment with some confirmation.  I already feel guilty for celebrating so early.

Something else that is interesting – when I am sitting down on our leather couch and go to get up quickly, like I normally would, I often feel like I have pulled a muscle in my uterus!  OMG, I usually am hunched over from the pain.  It goes away pretty quickly, but it is crazy!  I’m sure child birth will be just like it – hahahahaha.

Taco Bell, please.

So, I’ve been told that you crave what you are deficient in, nutritionally.  Looks like I’m deficient in Taco Bell!  Hell yeah.  It is pretty much all I can stomach right now.  How weird is that?  I mean, I’ve always liked Taco Bell, but only indulged on a drunk evening here and there in the past.  Now, it’s all I can think about leading up to lunch.  A nacho cheese chalupa, a cool ranch dorito taco, and now, they’ve created the ultimate taco…a cool ranch cheesy gordita crunch.  Stop me now.  “Elizabeth, I’m coming!”  ::grabs heart::   (ode to Sanford).

Tomorrow begins week 9 of this shit show that they call the first trimester.  Otherwise known as the third level of hell.  “It will get better!”   “Oh, I never had morning sickness!”   “You will be so happy because it’s so worth it in the end when you have your baby in your arms!”   Okay, everyone can SUCK IT.  Those things are the exact opposite of what I want to hear right now.  Even if you have to make up the fact that you had some type of morning sickness to make me feel better about myself, you should probably do that.  Otherwise, there is a good chance we aren’t going to be on speaking terms much longer.

My sister-in-law sent me an email about going to get sized up for my bridesmaid dress by Thanksgiving.  I can’t wait to have that conversation with David’s Bridal.   “Um, yeah, so I’m going to be due right around the wedding date.  So I’m either going to be super huge fatty, or still huge fatty, but not as super.  What can you do for me?  Should I just buy two dresses and hope for the best?”   “No, the bride doesn’t know this information yet, so don’t mention anything about my dress size being a 35, please”

I’ve basically stopped caring about my job, in general.  I have all of these piles all over my desk.  I used to want to organize and condense.  Then, I realized that the woman who works directly under me is getting paid overtime to basically check her personal emails during work.  Since I am salary, I do not get OT.  At first, I got mad.  But now, I’ve decided to get even (plug First Wives Club).  I get to work as close to 9 a.m. as possible, and I am out the door at 5:01 p.m.   And I’m taking my full hour lunch now.  None of this “oh I am going to work through my lunch because there is just so much to do” business.  It’s a good feeling, that not caring.  Less stress for me, less stress for bebay!

My first doctor’s appointment is Monday.  I’m terrified because they might take blood from me, which is not cool.  Last time we tried that, I was so dehydrated that the blood wouldn’t flow fast enough into the little tube.  We would have been there for hours if the nurse didn’t make me chug a bottle of water.  Of course, I am also worried since I really want to hear the bebay’s heartbeat.  I’d feel much better knowing that something living in me was causing all of this pain and suffering.  Anyhow, I have many important questions for my doctor – they pretty much all have to do with food.  I have read in random places that I cannot eat certain things, but they are all things that I love, so I am hoping she will say the famous, “anything in moderation”….such as:   ‘Can I eat fried hot dogs?’  (this is a biggie for a certain vacation I’m going on soon), and ‘Can I please eat a sandwich?  Just one?!’   Clearly, my OBGYN will know where my priorities are.

I just have a feeling that I’m not going to be one of those “glowing” pregnant ladies who you can’t tell is pregnant from behind.  Oh well, hubby is out getting me Taco Bell right now.  You win some, you lose some 😉

So, I’m Going to be a Mom.

I am about 7 weeks pregnant right now.  We haven’t told anyone yet, but we are going to have to very soon.

We had a scheduled trip to the wineries in Traverse City for Columbus Day weekend with his parents.  They rented a nice little house on the lake.  You better believe that we are still going.  They have some killer restaurants up there, so hopefully I will be feeling well enough to eat.  But that is likely when we will tell his parents.  Since I won’t be drinking like a fish, as per usual.

A few notes on pregnancy thus far:

The movies, TV, and everything else I can think of have pregnancy ALL WRONG.

They make it seem like all pregnant girls are fat and happy, rarely getting sick, and just love love love food of any type!  Seriously, every movie/ tv show I can remember about someone being pregnant involves the girl stuffing her face without a problem.

Guess what?  Food actually disgusts me right now (which is normal, once I started reading about it).   Everything I once loved makes me gag (for the most part).  And the things that I once loved, I also cannot eat now.  Sandwiches and hot dogs.  Kiss them goodbye during pregnancy.  You better believe that the first delivery my husband will be making to the hospital after the baby is born is hot dogs and Subway.  No joke!

I’ve gotten sick numerous times, but not enough to classify it as Hyperemesis Gravidarium.  I’m not as cool as Duchess Kate.   But for real, taking prenatal vitamins require so much concentration now!  Trying to swallow those bad boys will test your gag reflex like no other.  Disgusting.  I haven’t had to take any time off of work yet, but I’m sure that will happen in the future.  I’ve become far less productive at work though, that is for sure!  Thank God for interns.

I will be happy after we pass over that 12 week mark.  Supposedly, you are supposed to start feeling better after the first trimester.  I don’t buy it!

More pregnancy updates to follow…